“Love yourself first, so you can love others”

Self-love is a condition where we have confidence and pride in our own ability to be able to enjoy the beautiful moments in life. However in reality this self-love also feels difficult to achieve because we often feel guilty when prioritizing personal interests over others. So don't be surprised if many people forget that they are valuable beings and are entitled to various kinds of goodness in their lives.

Although it takes time and a fairly long process, the following ways are worth trying to practice and achieve self-love in your life.


1. Take Responsibility For Yourself

Someone who is less able to love himself is usually because they are not used to learning to recognize their responsibility to themselves. This is because we are accustomed to depending on others since childhood, where we voluntarily and cluelessly let others take over our responsibilities, starting from meeting basic, physical, emotional needs, and loving parenting.

Therefore, as we get older we must learn to recognize and complete our responsibilities as adults.  From prioritizing ourselves, starting from fulfilling the basic human need for love, needs, and desires in life. Always remember that in this life, only we can and have full responsibility to create our own happiness so that later we can be kind sincerely.


2. Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

In today's digital world, social media can highly influence a person's attitude and mindset. Through social media too, we can easily see the lives and achievements of others. Unfortunately, it makes us often compare ourselves with others. If you're allowing it to happen, it will unconsciously destroy your self-esteem and self-love. It's because you always think you are not better than others.

Being wise in social media and stopping comparing yourself with others are the most appropriate solution to practice self-love. Remember that everything on social media is not entirely true or complete, because most people only show the pretty facade without showing the struggle behind it.


3. Create Boundaries and Learn to Say “No”

Constantly feeling bad and putting other people first can also potentially damage your own self-love. This is what ultimately makes it difficult for you to refuse or say 'no' to others. Therefore, it is important to be assertive by creating physical and emotional boundaries for others by:

  • Dare to say "no" without guilt
  • Confidently make decisions and limit other people's opinions
  • Defend yourself and try to fulfill your own needs

To create this boundary, you don't have to apologize or feel guilty to the other person. These limits can also change later, and you can even create new boundaries that can help you achieve better self-love.


4. Avoid Toxic Environment

To be able to practice self-care more optimally, another powerful way is to stay away from toxic people who have bad influences on the process of learning to love yourself. Reporting from Kompas.com, here are the criteria for toxic people who can snatch happiness in your life.

  • Not supportive even afraid to see you grow or achieve something
  • Often says or reacts negatively
  • Ignores your opinion and thinks they are always right
  • Breaking the boundaries you've created
  • Makes you feel tired after spending time together


5. Pay Attention to The Power of Words

Learning to love and respect yourself can also start by paying attention to every word we use every day. Not only how we explain ourselves, but also how we interpret life. Sometimes, some people (maybe you are one of them) have a habit of speaking in negative sentences and even being sarcastic when talking about anything. This is what finally unconsciously makes life according to the label that has been pinned through their words so far. Just like the saying "Your words become your reality", every word that comes out of our mouths has very strong power. Therefore it is very important to use it wisely, especially when learning to achieve self-love itself.


6. Plan Fun Activities

The next effective way to practice self-love is by planning various fun activities that are beneficial for physical, mental, and emotional health, such as:

  • Light exercise according to physical ability
  • Watch a movie or relax at home
  • Cook your favorite food
  • Shopping for daily necessities
  • Staycation to favorite destinations
  • Treatment to beauty clinic or salon


Apart from these activities, you can also do some other things that can give you a sense of comfort, joy, and of course, you can express your heart's content, for example with a self-care session with quality skincare. To start with, you can do skincare ritual using a series of skincare and makeup products from ULTIMA II before doing your daily activities.

This way, you will not only be someone who takes charge of your situations and doesn't rely on other people to give you a sense of love and comfort. It's all because we are all worthy and deserve all the good things in the world, Ladies!

ULTIMA II | The Ageless Expert Founded in New York